Perinatal Loss.

On the death of a baby, 9/20/12

Your baby sailed to Jesus,
 He's asleep on that boat? allowing
All that pain, this great grief, unjust,
As if the bandits broke into your ship at sea, sniped your best mates,
Left you alone, no moorings, no bearings, to float to harbor vacant of value,
If you ever arrive, your sea-town asks questions you can't answer about the loss.

The Greatest Piracy is death of the innocent, your long voyage made longer,
Can you turn around and chase and fight the Swindler?  The sea's too big for that,
Sail on, hoping for a home, trusting in the lull that may never end.

The Windless days can drag, the monotony of loss is loud,
Your silence speaks of the ones you can't speak to anymore,
You'll never hear that voice ever and the Voice who calmed Winds is asleep.

You were expecting sleepless nights, sleepless because of the voyage purpose would require it,
But now to be sleepless with no purpose is as heavy as a cargo,

You were expecting crying but not your own, expecting change, but not your own soul's, expecting a beautiful storm, not this drudge,

Keep the question as pinnacle, "Asleep on my boat?"
Ask the why to the windless sky, "Asleep on my boat?"
What kind of king remains, "Asleep on my boat?"

You can't hear crying, only dying, fading, sighing,
"Even the waves and the winds obey me,"
Wanting to hear, hoping to hear,
"He is not dead, but asleep,"
But he's dead.

You get answers, but you're still adrift, and will be for awhile yet,
"Even the waves and the winds obey me,"
And you hope for a wind so you can see it obey,
The one to whom your Love sailed away.

Dear Sandra,

In response to an article by my favorite female vocalist, Sandra McCracken, who I long, long, long to become a Pro-Life advocate a greater lover of HUMAN BEINGS, eclipsing her great concern for this planet.  Lord, may you move our hearts & minds to speak boldly for your most precious creation!

Thanks, Sandra, for your voice & words which push me into Jesus, the Jesus who taught me that it is people that I must fight for first, die for first, as He did.

Read article here.  

And here's my thoughts:


Sandra, thank you for your eloquent thoughts on the beauty of my Father's World.  We are blessed to live in this Great Beauty.  I too come from a family that appreciates the theology and the biology that is our human existence.  I have the gift of coming from a family focused on HEAVEN and things that last: people, the Bible, and my Jesus.

Clarify?

First:  "each of us can enter into this practice of conservation believing that we can be part of tangible renewal. For some, it might take the shape of educating or gardening..."

What renewal do you think Jesus came to bring?  Is it not the Romans 12:1 renewal of the mind?  Where does, when speaking of the creation, does God mandate anything but the "be fruitful and multiply" of Genesis 1:28?  Does God not judge our evil against EACH OTHER with far greater grief and consequences than our evil against his temporal planet?  Should we as believers be advocating with ALL OUR BEINGS the care of the most beautiful creation, humans?  Yes, STEWARD wisely, but oh so diligently steward HUMAN RIGHTS and by giving humans freedom and justice, God will take care of his earth, right?

When you speak of loving what God loves, my God loves PEOPLE, HUMANS, HIS IMAGE-BEARERS, and we know that ultimately, "The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare." (2 Peter 3:10)

How can you urge Christians to become scientists for any other reason than saving HUMAN BEINGS when we know that everything else will be burned up, but that human souls last forever?  And, yes, of course, by urging "creation care" we can help humans see the gospel, but I think it can become a very dangerous road with the tempermate of naturalistic, Darwinian, secular environmentalism.  OH, be careful for what does light have to do with darkness?

 Second: "Together we multiply our potential for sustainability..."  What exactly do you mean?  The sustainability my God loves in the church, desperately focused on preaching the gospel, the temporality of this wicked planet, and the reality of a NEW HEAVEN and NEW EARTH.  God sustains, right?  And what does this "sustainability" agenda many governments have truly have to do with the gospel?  Can people not come to know Jesus regardless of if the earth is perishing?

Lastly: "This is the beginning of care and conversation, whether it's about protecting dolphins, or about the community garden, or about policy making on Capitol Hill."

As you begin, I urge you to please not forget that in God's book, the Bible, PEOPLE are always first!  People!  Not dolphins.  The dolphins don't have souls, but the people do.  And the darkness of the lies of overpopulation and forced contraception are rampant and may we as the church, people who know God, become the greatest advocates for God's greatest creation.  May your community garden's purpose be to feed HUNGRY PEOPLE and may your advocacy on capitol hill be to speak for FORGOTTEN PEOPLE (e.g. PREBORNS and the oppression of those under Islam/Communism/Despotism).  Yes, many innocent animals and species have died under my watch as God's creation-keeper, but more tragically, in my lifetime over 24 million American babies have been aborted.  I'm sorry, Lord, that I have not cared for your creation as I ought!

In our creation care, we must care for the most precious creation FIRST, and as we focus on the beautiful human beings, I do believe the NEW earth and NEW heavenwill get more beautiful as heaven becomes fuller with human souls, all the while knowing this beautiful earth is SOON TO BURN.  May it burn sooner so Jesus comes more quickly!

Because peeps matter most.

Matthew 7:1

per·son [pur-suhn]

 

per·son

   [pur-suhn] Show IPA

noun

1.

a human being, whether man, woman, or child: The tableseats four persons.

2.

a human being as distinguished from an animal or a thing.

3.

Sociology . an individual human being, especially withreference to his or her social relationships and behavioralpatterns as conditioned by the culture.

4.

Philosophy . a self-conscious or rational being.

5.

the actual self or individual personality  of a human being:You ought not to generalize, but to consider the person you aredealing with.

An Anthem About Being Alive

Everyone else seems to be taking a stab at poetry they hope will be unique enough to not remind someone of better- classic poetry like Keats or the Beatles. Here's my effort: 

This is not a love poem; it's a life verse:
 An anthem about being alive
[life isn't an irredeemable curse]
 I've heard that some people have a right not to ever see the sun.
 Well, I read poetry by a boy whose life had been shattered, and he said he was thrilled to be alive.

 I'm positive that that the "right to die" is a revolting lie.

 Those choices I've made in the garden of my heart- glancing around, sneaking fruit out in my pockets- those never brought life.

 All I got from them was strife, screams in a locked bathroom.

 So the "right to choose" [the one we sinned to attain] well, I'm rethinking whether or not that was a gain or a dreadful loss.

 Somebody Who always made the right decisions
 Took a myriad of incisions
 On sinless skin
 That was His choice- crying out in a loud voice for us to be forgiven
of our free will abuse.

 So I guess I'm pro-choice when it comes to my Creator's voice.
 What He's spoken I'll do
 That means thinking about you and your soul, whose choices you're gonna follow: will they be His or are you sticking with you?

 That's the anthem- I was probably off key
So I'll leave it to the Saviour to compose the rest of the symphony.

So Strong: An Ode to a Mother; I Took Step One

These are poems written by boys who had the roughest of blows dealt to them, that eventually led to juvenile delinquent centers. A man named Don Smarto went to their prisons and taught them poetry.

They are people. They are just like us. They are unfinalizable, redeemable, incredible human beings. They wrote poetry.

So Strong--

My Mother
I love her so

I apologize
I really do
The love
Well, stronger than me and you

I miss her so
Three years gone
More time uncounted
Such a bad son

I wish I could make things better
But how?
I cried
I lied
I hurt her so
Constant pain since my birth

A lady so beautiful
So filled with love
My Mother, so strong

-Scott, 18.


I Took Step One--

I took Step One, began to moan
I can't do this one on my own.
I took Step Two, began to pray
Restore me God, please now, today.

I took Step Three, gave up my will
Maybe God could love me still.
I took a Fourth, I looked inside
Nothing more would I hide.

And on the Fifth, I said aloud
I've done some wrong, and I'm not proud.
I took Step Six, and got prepared
To lose the defects, I was scared.

Now I'm at Seven, take them away
My God, for this I do pray.
And on Eight, the list was long
Amends to make for all the wrongs.

I took Step Nine, put down my pride
Amends made, I will not hide.
Step Ten I take, each day I pray
I make amends along the way.

And on Eleven I pray to know
Each day His Will, which way to go.
I take Step Twelve, I'm like a bird
To others now, I spread His Word....

-Juan, 16.

Hard to Read

There are a few instances in life where people tell us things we never forget.  This week, for better or for worse, I heard such a statement.

I was told, "Caroline, you are hard to read."  It was quite an intense situation--a tense conflict with the core issue being LIFE.  It's kinda cool to be a little mysterious, eh?  It's kinda cool to know you're more than meets the eye...or is it?  Are Pro-lifers not called to be translucent, literally, just shining the light of LIFE with no silly obstructions?  Or is it LIFE that is "hard to read" and when we are translucent the watching world cannot understand how we MUST LOVE the littlest among us?

I like to think the latter.  I like to think that being a believer in an unbelieving world and being and lover of life is a world that hates LIFE is "hard to read."  I like to think that being Pro-Life with no excuses or exceptions is just hard to read.  People don't wanna read you so they ignore you.  Just like the Bible.

If it's out of sight it can be out of mind.

If a little baby, only 9 weeks after conception, is out of sight than I don't have to realize it's real.  And when I see it, I don't want to understand so I choose to believe it's just "hard to read."

Sometimes the simplest, brightest, and most translucent ideas are the ones that are most hated.

And I say, let's not hate our preborns and let's transparently tell everyone that our preborns matter.  They matter a lot.